What part of “overkill” don’t you understand?

I followed this van into the parking field at Disney’s Animal Kingdom this morning. You think maybe they’re pro-lifers much? 😉

We parked side by side and as soon as the van’s doors slid open, a pile of kids spilled out. I counted five but there were more strapped into car seats inside. They all appeared to be under the age of ten.

I believe the parents were in their mid-30s. The father was rail thin and prematurely gray. His lips were pressed together as he went about the grim business of unfurling strollers. The mother was bloated and harassed. She started bitching at one kid or another the second her battered Keds hit the pavement. The kids have names like "Noah" and "Miriam" (hint: if a random stranger knows your kids’ names, that means you’re picking at them too loud or too much – possibly both).

Fine. You’ve got beliefs and you’re passionate about them. Are you happy, though? Is your mirthless, mean behavior at all Christ-like? Just askin’…

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3 thoughts on “What part of “overkill” don’t you understand?”

  1. Oh am I qualified to respond to this post – from the point of view of the children that is. Mostly because I am 1 of 9 children, (although in my parents defense, we were all born before the advent of the pill and permanent sterilization was major surgery at the time.)

    Nevertheless, being brought up in the middle of such a “crowd” of kids left indelible marks upon me and my siblings. Oh yes, there were a few good times and my mother was a remarkable mother, but there were also many not-so-good times.

    All of my sisters and brothers (except 1) have had no more than 2 children. (The one brother who had 3 boys, readily admits that his wife wanted to try for a girl after the 1st 2 boys. But that brother and sister-in-law spaced their children 5 years apart to enable them to devote a huge amount of time to each child when they were young).

    It was never a topic amongst myself or my siblings, but we all just instinctively understood that limiting the size of your family potentially provided more benefits to the family.

    And that’s what it boils down to – time. Time for each child. Because those children spilling out of that van cannot be given enough of each parent’s time. It’s simply not possible.

    People like this – or like the ‘Duggars’ make me feel ill.

    In most cases, the kids should not outnumber the parents, but if people ‘love kids’ so much that they want more kids than fingers on one hand, they should have a only a couple of their own and then seriously consider adopting some older ‘unadoptable’ children.

    Merely birthing kids does not make you a parent.

    1. Amen Mari. As one of seven, I agree. Add to that, the oldest don’t ever really have a childhood because they are raising kids when they are kids. Dysfunction is boundless. I do love getting together now with all of my siblings, we are a rowdy bunch. But there’s a reason I only had 2…we aren’t outnumbered and we have time for both. I will say that my father was an only child, and that was his reason for wanting so many kids. And he LOVES having us all get together at one time, especially with 10 grandkids and 1 on the way. He just always wanted to be surrounded. In our case, we don’t always get along and there is always some drama (I am currently not speaking to my youngest asshat brother) but let someone else criticize. You’ll get an ass-cutting.

  2. My parent’s had four but I hear they wanted six! I was number two, and the only girl. That made me Cinderella, pre-princess days. My older brother and I flipped every morning to see who would get the dog for the day and who would get my younger brothers. I also cooked, washed dishes and did laundry as soon as I could reach all the controls.

    I look back and see that my mother was clearly overwhelmed and my father was always working overtime. While 4 isn’t the same as 7 or 9, it’s still apparently twice as expensive as two, and the responsibilities do have to be spread out to the oldest.

    I kind of like the idea of the kids not outnumbering the parents. This is not an agricultural society any more. We don’t need to keep on birthing free labor year after year. Two is good.


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